Twisted Up InsideWould you ever know the feeling,Of being twisted, over and over.Much like a string of high-tension cord;Ready to snap at any moment.You are barely controlling this swell of emotion.Keeping it taut, lest it burst from the surface.A plastic smile serves as your only defense;Witty banter, to stave off a deeper inquiry.You hide the signs of your sickness;Quickly easing the pressure.Whilst appearing to adjust the suit,You move through the crowd like a fading wisp.Rushed, sweating and just barely contained.You duck into the shadows, so you might breathe again.-Chen Yuan Wen, Broken World Series, 13th November 2013
Yes, I am a teenage girl Yes, I am a teenage girl No, I don't squeal over One DirectionNo, I don't wear mini skirtsNo, I don't curl my hair everydayNo, I don't need my phone 24/7Yes, I am a teenage girlYes, I prefer Edward Scissorhands over Edward CullenYes, I like violent video gamesYes, I like action moviesYes, I listen to RockYes, I am a teenage girlNo, I don't draw hearts all over my homeworkNo, I don't spend 20 minutes trying to make myself resemble a porcelain dollNo, I'm not afraid to cryNo, I don't party every weekendYes, I am a teenage girlYes, I hate reality showsYes, my hair is short and messyYes, I'd rather walk in the woodsYes, I am okay with miceYes, I am a teenage girlYes, I'm differentYes, I'm strangeYes, I'm my own personWhy is that bad?Why do you hate me for that?Why can't I just be myself without your criticism?Why is it horrible if I'm not just like you?I don't have a problem with itMaybe the problem
NumbMy thoughts of you have grown numb, With a cold whisper fingering My shivering heart Without care. My perspective of you has changed, Seeing finally who youReally are inside For once. My feelings for you have morphed To a numb understanding that You will always Be only My friend. My fantasies and visions of youHave disappeared entirelyLeaving only a Cold whisper.... ...causing the scar over my heart to go numb.
A White Tiger's ThoughtsWhy do you like me? Why can't you look in my eye?I don't want to live I want to dieI didn't want to be born this wayI didn't want to be whiteIt just causes problems, all day and all nightI can't hunt for my food properly because they can see meIf you were white and in a rainforest you wouldn't blend into the grass or a treeI'm only in circuses, or low standard zoos, but all of that puts me in the bluesThey say I conserve the species and it's a big lieI bet you're wondering why I want to dieI don't want to live because the only way to get me is to inbreed meWith this I get crossed eyes, skulls that hurts, that will make it hard for me to seeMy father and mother are most likely siblingsBut people come and see me because they love different thingsUnfortunately for my siblings born orange people barely seem to careDon't you understand its better to defend my cousins who are rare?I wanted to be born orange to be healthy and pureNot going to see me is the cureYou may think
Help MeHelp me. Please. I'm trying to escape from this depression creeping up on me, but it's catching up. I don't want to be depressed. I don't want to have tears flood my eyes every night.I don't want to hide behind this crumbling mask of emotion,But no one bothers to ask if I'm truly alright. Everyone assumes I'm as happy as can bewithout a single care in the world.No one really sees the inside where I'm hurting and confused... But no one bothers to rip off the cover of my story and see me for who I really am.
SuicideMy dreams fall,my life is shattered,into the glass of life.I got the rope,i have the chair,now the only thing i need is hope.Now I sit downwashing my fears away,re-thinking of what is gonna happen.Will they miss me,will they even care,will they know that I'm even gone?I know it now,what i must do,what lies in store for me,They never loved me,they always picked on me,so why would they care?now i wipe my tears away,slicing my wrist,wincing in pain.I stand on a chair,Re-thinking of it all,Now glad what i am doing.Putt the rope around my neck,wipe my tears of fear away,kicking the chair away.Now i hang,my body lifeless,knowing i have done the right thing.They never cared,the ones who did,never showed emotion.Now i am somewhere,where people actually care,that's why i have done,.....Suicide.....
SufferingTears crashing around meas all I do is feel this hurtThe pain deep inside of meI can't bear to go on much longerThe eyes of glassthe heart that achesI can't controlthe urges i feel inside meMy mind takes over controlof this hurt left unknownI can't help but to cryand have the tears falling down my faceI can't take this much longerso please go on without meThe truth behind every storythe deep hurt i feel insideI feel like a failure at lifeno hope for this life to go onso please leave me here to sufferMaybe one day it will all change
keep holding on -stop suicideKeep holding onThere was girl that everyone thought lived a happy life. Every time people saw her at school, she was smiling. Her beautiful blue-gray eyes shone and her brown hair was kept out of her face. Her clothing was always in neat condition. Today she was wearing a light blue shirt and a pair of faded jeans with some rips in it. She thought the non-pristine condition of her jeans would be like a beacon for someone to notice something was not right. They just continued their day as if it were just a normal day.No one knew about the 'mask' that she wore. When she arrived home, she 'took off' the smiley mask and became depressed. She let her hair fall into her face, covering her sad eyes. She didn't want any of her few friends to know about her sad life. She didn't think they'd care too much. A simple 'It will be okay. Life will get better.' and a pat on the shoulder and off they went. That wasn't comforting. Life may get better in the way future...but what about now?
I Am That GirlI'm the girl who writes poemsBecause it helps me get my feelings out.It's the only way I know how.I'm the girl who will love anyoneNo matter who they are.I'm the girl, who can be annoying at times,But I love life and everything in it.I'm the girl who will always makeRoom in her heart for someone,Because I love just about everyone.I'm the girl, who will flirt with you,But never admit to you how I really feel.I'm the girl who will truly love you.No one will ever love you as much as I do.
It Is (Depression)It is a shroud of black velvet.It is the violent ocean in the dead of night.It is the monster in the shadows; the Vashta Nerada.It is the final crash of symbols in Carmina Burana.It is impossible to lift.it is impossible to breathe.It is impossible to see.It is the only thing that can be heard.It is why the stars disappear at night.It is why every light drifts by without stopping.It is why the gnawing starts and never ceases.It is why nothing else matters in the end.It is my disease.It is my disability.It is my misfortune.It is my death sentence.
What is fear?I was told to find out about fear. They said to ask people what fear was. So first, I asked a small child.“What is fear?”The child frowned thoughtfully. “Fear is when the monsters under your bed are out to get you and you know it, but your mommy and daddy don’t believe you.”I thanked him and kept going. Next, I asked an old woman.“What is fear?”The old woman looked sad. “Fear is the feeling of death creeping up on you and you knowing it is impossible to stop. Fear is being helpless to stop it. Be thankful that you are still young.”I nodded thanks and kept moving. Finally, I asked a girl with scars on her arms and a scowl on her face.“What is fear?”She laughed derisively. “If you need to ask, you won’t know.”“But I do know!” I protested. “I know that fear is. I just want to know what you think fear is.”“Do I have to answer?”I smiled encouragingly. “As